As my [[The Nostalgia Arc|Nostalgia Arc]] continues, I've been thinking about how it serves as a form of gratification thanks to what I've been able to hold onto from the past - or rather, the lack thereof. To keep a long story short, my dad was your typical layabout, and his ineptitude and inability to take care of my family meant that we downsized from a three-story home to a two-story home to a three-bedroom apartment. With each move, it became more and more important to figure out what to keep and what to let go. Because of this, I don't have much from my past to be nostalgic about in physical form. My old consoles and games and notebooks with silly comics on them have all been sold or given away. I didn't really have the ability to hold on to things until I was in college to be honest. So when I put every N64, [[Game Boy Advance|GBA]], [[PlayStation|PS1]] and [[PlayStation 2]] game I ever owned on my [[Ayn Odin 2|Odin 2]] and [[CubeXX]], it feels almost like a reclamation, or at the very least a middle finger to my dad. I don't have my original copy of **Pokemon Heartgold** anymore, but I can recapture my memories of playing it with the right software. And now that all of it's digital, I don't have to worry about it taking up space that I might not have, now or in the future. It goes beyond games too. It's gutted me to this day that the full **Trigun** DVD collection we used to have has ended up on someone else's shelf. And don't even get me started on my books. I used to dream of handing my **Redwall** collection down to my own kids if I ever had any, but I gave up on that idea until very recently. Generational heirlooms don't get passed down when you're poor. So in engaging with the nostalgia arc, I'm also rebuilding my past out of spite. Sifting through my memories to keep track of what was most defining to me as a kid, even adding it to a private note in [[Obsidian]]. Thinking about what I want as physical items to keep, that I might want passed down in the future. I don't know what I'll end up keeping, but I'm happy I at least have a choice this time.