Once in a while I think about Bigolas Dickolas Wolfwood, the Trigun stan account that almost single-handedly took the book *This Is How You Lose the Time War* to the top of the best-selling list. This was a very cool thing to witness, and also uncovered a great anxiety in me that I didn't know I had. Specifically, it's wild as a creator to think about just *how* reliant I am on people I don't know to be kind enough to share my work. I'm not even one to do this for a living, but it's still a scary thought. I love making stuff, as I've said many times before. But to act like I do it exclusively for myself would be a lie. I make what I make for myself first and foremost, that's certainly accurate...but I want people who might be interested to see it as well! To feel something when they see it, and maybe tell their friends about it too! None of that comes from resentment by the way. Resentment is the enemy of happiness when it comes to creativity. Mostly I'm just annoyed at how volatile success can be as a creative. I love every comment, like, or general interaction I get with my work. But at the same time I don't keep track of the numbers because I know it'd irritate me! And the fact that one random post about my work could be the thing for even more people to care about what I create is pretty damn exhausting. It's hard not to imagine the possibilities of what I want my work to become. I don't want to rely on other people for dopamine, but it's tough not to! It's a parasocial fantasy that I don't appreciate, but it's hopefully understandable too. A big reason I started [[The Cohost Project Database]] is this very aspect. I want to be someone else's bigolas dickolas. Maybe we can all be each others' bigolas dickolas! I can't claim that I have reach or the spark of virality that will make everyone stop and look at what you do, but if I can aid in that, I'll feel pretty good. I want to post about the work of people I enjoy to help us all tread water in this turbulent online storm.