[Source](https://cohost.org/vectorpoem/post/2049255-theoretical-near-fut) [[06 Links]] day 0: multiple news outlets report on recently unearthed documents detailing plans and pending permit applications to construct a "piss house" - a house made entirely from large blocks and beams of frozen piss - for billionaire tech mogul Turmd Ergmo just outside the Austin, Texas metro area. day 1: Ergmo's PR team flatly denies the existence of the piss house. day 4: in a candid interview with Worth Magazine, Ergmo contradicts previous denials and expounds upon the piss house plans. "It's real, yes. I just think it's an important thing to build, right now." day 5: tech thought leaders sound off on the piss house. several tech companies pledge to construct their own piss houses. "This is an emerging market. You can't afford to fall behind." day 7: Popular Mechanics runs a deep dive on the intricacies of piss house engineering, quotes one of Ergmo's trusted advisors. "As you might expect, cooling is a _major_ challenge... we're solving all kinds of new problems here. It's terrifying but also exciting." day 8: hastily taken photos of the piss house work site leak onto social media. various commentators weigh in on the apparent safety conditions, construction methods, piss supply and cooling infrastructure in evidence. day 11: cryptocurrency entrepreneur turned AGI researcher ~povdeh-koprop goes viral on hackernews with her unconventional prototype DIY piss house. "These actually don't _need_ to cost ten billion dollars. A piss house is something anyone can have... and I shouldn't need to tell you, this changes everything." day 14: Newsweek's cover story for the month: "THE PISS HOUSE REVOLUTION" - "Soon, we might all be living in houses constructed entirely from large blocks and beams of frozen piss. Meet the genius scientists, inventors, and builders making it possible today." day 19: one of Ergmo's construction foremen is in critical condition after a work site accident. Ergmo's PR team is extremely tight-lipped about any details. day 25: taking questions from the audience after speaking, a panel of piss house industry leaders at SXSW concede that it may prove more practical to construct piss houses exclusively in Antarctica, where year-round climate renders the by-now-widely-acknowledged "huge melting piss problem" moot. day 57: Ergmo's net worth has tumbled by 30% after two of his non-piss-house-related companies record sharp Q2 revenue declines and a third declares bankruptcy. Ergmo remains evasive and upbeat at the press conference, spends most of it talking about how well the piss house is going, calling it "A gift to all humanity. I mean, I'll be the one living in it. But really it's a gift to all of humanity." day 92: the world's three surviving investigative reporters publish an in-depth piece about the current status of the piss house construction project. the work site appears to be completely abandoned, flooded with viscous liquid and the smell of ammonia, dead animals strewn about its perimeter. interviews with neighbors, some of which had to evacuate their homes, mostly focus on "the stench... I'll never forget it. Nothing else smells like that." day 301: the piss house is mentioned only briefly in two year-end "2024 in Tech" roundups. tech CEO and frequent Ergmo collaborator Smig Dolmak: "I still think it's an important idea for the future of our species. But I think there's such a thing as being _too_ early. People laughed at the automobile and, you know, before that the potter's wheel. I still believe that by the end of this decade, all of us will be living in piss houses."